Who let the clogs out? or Where my clogs at?

Lets change it up here folks.
Lets do something crazy.
This post is about something i really like. Just so ALL of you readers don't think that i am a bitter person full of piss, vinegar, vitriol, and hater-ade. Here's the deal, anyone who knows me can attest to how fashionable i am but i have a little bit of a secret, that isn't really that secret. i love my clogs, that's right clogs. i in fact have two pair(or puhr as it were).
Bam!
And i am completely unashamed, they make my back feel great and my feet feel like they are walking on a pillowy cloud of ergonomic support. It started when i had some sort of job i can't quite remember for about two years. Eventually i was wearing them around the house and even (*gasp*) camping. But never on the street that is where i draw the line. You will know if i have given up on life if you run into me on shotwell with a country club, sweat pants, slicked back hair, leather vest, and my danskos. In that event throttle me to death with whatever is handy and leave me to die because it would be what i want. Until then! If you are over at my house and want to try on a pair of these babies just let me know i have an extra pair just in case.

Now back to the bitterness...








THESE ARE NOT OKAY.
Especially decorated, but especially in public, or on families. You look even more like an over grown child than you did already in your one size fits all cargo pants and Abercrombie hat.
It's like if you enjoy pooping on your partner, i am all for that, hell my middle name might as well be "feel good revolution" (Note: Do NOT call me that) but keep it at home where the bacteria doesnt get spread around like it does on the street where i live(more poopy than average trust me.) If you must wear crocs, and i understand if you do, leave them at home with the fuck swing for gods sake.(special thanks to jessica beard for the inspiration for the second part of todays title.)

Hey! Hey! Hey! Shut Up!

My rock group Stirling Says
traveled down to the dirty south of beautiful California with the also beautiful
Finest Dearest
What a time we had! boy golly, boy howdy. I mean where to start???? The money? The drugs? The stadiums?
Anybody who missed it missed spectacle on the grand scale. Costume changes, an elephant, take that of montreal, AN ELEPHANT. But mostly just the advent of the idea of apprecibation which i will tell you about when you are older.

Opinion: If you ask someone to help you set up a show maybe you should watch them play after you do that. If you don't you will not get said show when you email them a month later. Hell you won't even get a reply. It was a small room folks we could literally see everybody and were NOT too drunk to not notice (for once).

Opinion 2: Any of you that know me know that i LOVE Sparks and other malt liquors(but thats a story for another post.) i will say this, Four Max is the GROSSEST energy drink malt liquor, hands down. I know a lot of people have made the claim that sparks tastes like coooough syrup(imagine that being read in a whiny falsetto) but this actually tasted like cough syrup, but with none of the "legs not working" fun of getting tussed. So of course i had to finish it, after a little teeny bit of vomiting up the chimichanga i ate earlier, it was done never to be done again.They misspelled the name, it should have been foul max.

Opinion 3: i got to see my grandma which was pretty neat too.

Woah kid do not touch that.

Get that kid away from that thing!!! What are you trying to teach that poor child? That "world influenced" funk-rock from berkeley is okay? Because it isn't. And that my friends is opinion number one for this post. Unless the parent is telling their little one that the ONLY reason a five string bass was made by god in the first place was for Mary J. Blige songs (opinion 2!), and he should stay away from this thick necked beast of an instrument like it was a non-ironic Big Johnson shirt. unless this pasty little kid wants to end up wearing backwards kangol caps, tank tops, and listening exclusively to King Crimson and Dream Theater, maybe Rush, he needs to step away from the 5 string bass.
ALSO, just because you can play a bass solo DOES NOT mean that you should.

Six string is completely out of the question.

Testing, testing 1..2...

Why am i doing this?
a: because i have opinions.
b: its a better way to spend slow days at work than googling myself.
c: PROFIT.

Opinion number one: Whoever designed this halfway house is a jerk. Like a giant hypo mainlining scenic 8th St. Call me overly sensitive but isn't it a little fucked up to design a building that looks like a syringe for people trying to recover from drug addiction. Maybe the architects idea was that it would draw them in...whatever way you look at it not cool.

Extra opinion for the first post: Sarah McLachlan is pretty good if you ask me.